Some people are natural parents. The children arrive, by blood or by adoption, and some deep seated knowledge kicks in.

I am not one of those people.

When my daughter final arrived, after a string of pregnancy disasters and difficulties, I found myself to be completely out of my depth. In infancy, I couldn’t tell whether a cry was for hunger or for tiredness. The hormones stew of pregnancy, delivery, and nursing left be adrift in depression. And when my next daughter unexpectedly arrived, leaving me home with two children aged two-and-under, I realized I disliked nearly all of the everyday tasks of parent (cooking, cleaning, dealing with toddler temper tantrums, endless hours of make believe…) In short, I felt like a TOTAL LOSER.

Thank God for these authors, who gave me companionship, laughter, and not a small amount of good advice for the journey. Give this collection as shower gifts, and your friends will love you forever. Or, stock your own shelves if you’re preparing for the onslaught of parenthood.

The Three-Martini Playdate: A practical guide to happy parenting
Christie Mellior

Already, you love the title, yes? Mellior’s basic premise that you were here first, and children should be seen only if they can be ever-so-helpful as to help Mommy pass out the cocktail napkins and crudities. Here’s an excerpt from the opening chapter:

Gone are the days when a small person of tender age would do as he or she was asked, good naturedly and obediently, and the rest of the time would sit quietly reading or practicing a simple cross stitch…One wasn’t required to transport the little children hither and tither, here to T-ball practice, there to a “playdate,” may the chipper mommy who coined that particular term forever rot in a hell of eternally colicky babies….
Let us be perfectly frank. You were here first. You are sharing your house with them, your food, your time, your books. Somewhere, in fairly recent memory, we have lost sight of that fact.

Oh, I hope you are ever so much in love! No one helped me take my parenting gig less seriously–something I was in deep need of after too many months of reading up on what to expect. So click here, and in a few days you could be sipping your favorite thing-made-with-gin with my soulsister and me. Cheers! Today’s Flavor: Pass the vodka.

The Girlfriends’ Guide to Surviving The First Year of Motherhood
Vicki Iovine

I like taking advice from former playboy models who have four children in six years (no, none of them are twins.) For instance, in regards to the many children, Iovine suggests not mixing red wine and your husband’s birthday. (Good point!)

Anyone with a sense of humor will enjoy this no-nonsense, practical, “we’ve been there” advice – including how to detect being postpartumish, a terrific term to help your friend identify when you need help with the post-delivery hormone stew. All of Iovine’s parenting books are helpful, but the first two: Pregnancy and First Year are are top notch. Today’s Flavor: Helps you out without stressing you out.

Operating Instructions
Anne Lamott

If you are a regularly reader of Magpie Girl, you already know that Anne is my priestess. My dear friend Wendy–mother of the adorable Rees, who we fully plan on marrying off to Eden–gave me this book shortly after the birth of my second child. More poetic than my other recommendations, but still deeply funny, Lamott’s story of adjusting to being the single mother to a baby boy is told with refreshing, and sometimes shockingly honesty. Once again, consumate story teller Lamott becomes an essential traveling companion, this time for those of us on the parenting road. Today’s Flavor: Real, with a touch of funny.

Order a book by clicking on one of the links above, and support this website! Find more books, music, and things I enjoy at Magpie Suggests. Tak!

The New Year slipped in as we were all snoozing away in snowy Chicago. After a day with all 12 little cousins, the grown-ups were happy to climb in bed long before the big ball dropped!

I’ve no resolutions this year. (I think moving overseas is challenge enough for ‘aught eight!)Please loves, if you make some resolutions, limit it to three and make sure at least one is truly doable. I beg you, be kind to yourselves.

In lieu of resolve, here are three amazing books that just might change your life without even trying. Each one was life changing for me, and I’m pretty darn sure they will help some of you out there as well. This week’s theme is Artist Unleashed. The next four Wednesdays in January will include themes around: Feeling Better, Budding Feminist, Religious Awakening, and Survival Parenting.

Of course, you’re always welcome to list your favorite texts in the comments. We love, Love, LOVE good reads. And as always, any purchase you make by clicking on a title below helps support this site.
Happy New Year to you…may you be much inspired.
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My Name Is Asher Lev
Chaim Potok

Raised in a Hasidic family, young Asher finds that his passion for painting does not jive with the stringent the life of an orthodox Jew. Yet his creative passion refuses to ebb, and he must find away to fuse art and faith.
My Name Is Asher LevThe Chosen are Potok’s finest works. Today’s Flavor: Achingly beautiful.

The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles
Steven Pressfield

I’ve quoted from this book before, but I think it merits another mention. I’ve read a lot of books about writing, but this is the one that helped me make a leap from “dabbling”, to “seriously working.” If this is the year for you to go pro, The War of ArtToday’s Flavor: Short bursts of inspiration.

Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life
Anne Lamott

Anne is my priestess and this one of my holy books. All the writing advice in here is golden. Whether she’s writing about the radio station in your head that tells you your no good (“K-FUCK”) , or prompting you to get through your “shitty first draft” Anne’s wisdom comes across loud and clear, without being preachy or cloying. Just click and get it, will ya? Today’s Flavor: A gentle kick in the ass.

Next week’s list: books for Feeling Better.

As a child I always asked for books at Christmas time. For some reason they rarely materialized. One year I was given two beautiful hardback books with colored plates: Little Women and Hans Brinker and the Silver Skates. Both are proud members of my book collection to this day.

My own children have a whole basket of holiday reading, from the mundane to the transcendent. This week I’m offering three charming tales sure to be Christmas classic. (Next week: beautifully illustrated nativity tales.)

Little Tree
e.e. cummings
Deborah Kogan Ray, illustrator

“little tree, little silent Christmas tree you are so little, you are more like a flower…”

My husband is a fan of e.e. cummings, and I gave him this beautiful watercolor of a book one Christmas when we were dating. Now we read the gentle story of Little Tree to our own children on quiet nights beside our Christmas tree. It’s out of print now, but you can still find a few gently used copies here. Today’s Flavor: Rhythmic and lovely.

The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree Gloria Houston, author
Barbara Cooney, illustrator

An Appalachian mother and daugther are determiend to retireve the mountain top Christmas tree Papa had earmarked before he left for the war. The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree is a simple, lovely tale about making do and making merry where a wedding dress becomes angel garb, and a clever mother finds a way to make her daughter’s Christmas wish come true. Well researched to capture the reality of Appalachian life and beautifully illustrated by Barbara Cooney, this can quickly become a Christmas classic in your home. Today’s Flavor: Nostalgic and hopeful.

P.s. Ms. Houston also wrote the fantastic My Great-Aunt Arizona and Ms. Cooney illustrated the wonderful Miss Rumphius.

Red Ranger Came Calling
Berkeley Breathed

Ohmylord, there cannot possibly be a more hilarious and charming tale than Red Ranger Came Calling, the story of a sour little boy and a disinhearted old … Saunder Clos? Berkely Breathed famed creator of Bloom County, Outland, and Opus, travels back to his childhood haunts on Vashon Island to illustrate a cheeky tale that’s sure to delight. Santa is down in the dumps and “visitors not recieved with zesty jolliness at the moment.” But by-gum, the Red Ranger of Mars is going up to his house to find out what happened to his “Official Buck Tweed Two-Speed Crime-Stopper Star-Hoper Bicycle.” What he finds there…well, I don’t want to give it all away. Suffice it to say that this comically illustrated book is a sure fire hit in our high-drama household. Today’s Flavor: Firey and fun.

Click on the links in this post to order these items, or any items at Magpie Suggests, and your purchases will help fund this site. Thank you for your support!

Wednesday Reviews: Thanksgiving Stories

I know it’s cutting it close, but on this day before Thanksgiving, I’d like to review some books for the diners who are sitting at the kids table.

The first is The Night Before Thanksgiving“>. Like the characters in this book, my children and their cousins giggle about the same things I snickered over with my cousins — goofing off at the kid’s table, putting olives on our fingers, and eating leftover turkey sandwiches. Nostalgic and fun.

The second is a more artful story The Very First Thanksgiving Day, which touches on the fact that we Western Europeans owe our very survival on this continent to the Native Americans who shared their skills and bounty with our ancestors so many years ago. Beautiful illustrations and a repetitive rhythm children love. Artful and insightful.

My seven year old daughter fell in love with this book, which she read to her two year old cousin last week. It’s not about our Fall holiday, but it does a lovely job of encouraging gratitude. Give Me Grace is short enough to memorize in a couple of readings, and the alluring illustrations feed the eye as well as the soul. Bright and meaningful.

Finally, I’d like to recommend this pretty, classic story. Ox-Cart Man is not directly about Thanksgiving, but it’s cyclical story of growing-and-harvesting captures the turning of the seasons, while it’s spare bounty quietly instills a since of gratitude amongst our overly-modern children. Classic and grateful.

Click on the links in this post to order these items, or any items at Magpie Suggests, and your purchases will help fund this site. Thank you for your support!