Ladies and gents, this morning I bring you a very special cross-cultural experience: Eurovision 2008.

Yes friends, long before Simon Powell got snotty on American Idol ,the citizens of Europe have been fighting amongst themselves to find the best songs/performers for the last 53 years. Last night the big finale was held in Belgrade, Serbia and 43 countries reported in with live voting results. With production numbers akin to the opening ceremonies at the Olympics, and with ratings to rival the Superbowl, Eurovision swept the continent last night. Even in little Denmark it was broadcast on no less than 3 stations with voice-over commentary in Danish, Swedish and German.

Truly, I’ve never seen anything weirder.

So here, to ease your way back into the work week with a smile and a baffled shake of the head, are my top pics from Eurovision 2008.

Most Enthusiastic
Latvia – seriously committed to the pirate look with Wolves of the Sea.

Most Confusing
France – always so classy, what with the women in beards an all…. Maybe they should have let Bret and Jemaine enter Foux Da Fa Fa instead.

Most Warped
Azerbaijan – operatic goth angels and something akin to vampires. Someone should probably check their basement for body parts.

Best of Show (According to Moi)
Croatia (music video, not show performance) — 75 yo rapper scratching on a gramophone w/a great band. This one is actually truly good.

Most Avant Garde
Bosnia & Herzegovina - Like the love child of Weird Al Yancovich and Cindy Lauper. Trip-ee!

Best “Ewwwww!” Factor
Spain - Apparently, Borat’s cousin rocks the house for Spain–complete with playskool electric guitar solo.

Most Likely to Rock Hard
Finland - These guys rock like Vikings! (This isn’t the live performance, but their music video. I actually kind of like ‘em!)

Official Winner (Really)
Russia - Do you think ripping open his shirt put them over the edge, or was it the ice skater?

P.s. My regular Monday post is still going up at BlogHer today. It’s on poetry as prayer and you can find it here.