Field Report: A Year Without Clothes by Allyson Dickinson

Today we have Allyson Dickinson with us to tell us a little bit about her Year Without Clothes. What might going a year without clothes shopping mean for you? Here’s what it’s revealing to Allyson….

My Year Without Clothes
by Allyson Dickinson

When I first read about Susan Wagner doing a no clothes shopping challenge for 6 weeks, I laughed out loud. The only word that came to mind was ridiculous. I mean honestly, who could do that? But then she said that Rachelle was doing it for a year and I had to come and read all about this challenge. So many things about this idea intrigued me, after I got over the shock.

My reasons for doing the challenge are many. I wish I could say that it was altruistic, but bottom line: I needed to work on my bottom line. Times are difficult. My family is no different. We live a great life in Southern California, but it isn’t without its challenges. We don’t have a lot of extra money to throw around at the end of the month and even less when clothes and shoe shopping came into play. The basic tenet of saving money was my first reason to take part, but then I started to think my reasons and quick willingness were deeper than that. I wanted to clear the decks both figuratively and mentally. If I can actually wear what I have and wear it out, it may be a first. If I can discard what I don’t wear and stick with what works for me, I will be giving myself the physical space to breathe. There were still some nagging questions though: Can I really do this? Who am I without the clothes? But more deeply: Who am I with/without the weight? Who am I without the job? Who am I without the money?

The Weight
My daily challenge: I live in Orange County, home of the nutty housewives. I have a kid in private school in a high socioeconomic enclave where what you drive and what you wear are of the utmost importance.

“Your jeans aren’t True Religion? Your shoes aren’t Tori Burch? Your bag isn’t Prada and you drive American?”

“You don’t have a plastic surgeon, chef, nanny, eye brow lady, manicurist, facialist, or botox injector on call?”

I have been defined based on my looks. I am overweight. I don’t blow dry/straighten my hair. I am an intelligent and competent person, but none of them would know it because they don’t talk to me. I don’t fit into the standard criteria of beautiful.

My thought: If I did this challenge I can free myself from their ties that bind me. I don’t have to be defined by their level of beauty, because for one year I won’t have to buy into it. I won’t have to try to make do with a Target clearance shirt and Burch knock offs. I won’t have to pretend I bought my dress at Nordstrom when it actually came from Kmart. I won’t have to try to attain the ideal, because “I can’t. It’s not allowed.” I can blame my lack of fashion on the challenge rather than my…lack…of…fashion. It is a win-win-win. I don’t have to pretend to fit in, I get to save money, AND I have something to blame it on. Sign me up!

The Job
I have become everything I used to detest in Orange County. I am a stay at home mom of 2 who is a college educated post grad. I gave up a career that I loved to stay home and drive a black SUV that mostly resides in my garage only to leave to go to school pick up, Target and the grocery store. Argh. When did this happen and why did I let it? What dreams did I have that I just gave up on? Although my reasons for staying home are noble, what if I am missing my moment? This challenge will hopefully afford me the time to delve into some of those things and open space in my life to actually consider what my dreams are again.

The Tips
1. I knew going in that I would not be able to avoid Target. There are such things as essentials. To walk to the children’s section, my usual route goes by the entire women’s section. The first few times I went, I mourned what I could not buy. We are now 10 weeks into the challenge and I walk by with nary a look. I know I am not buying anything so why bother looking? This has resulted in less time (and money) spent inside Target.
2. I receive MANY catalogs in the mail, mostly of the clothing nature. I would continuously flip through them and fold down pages of things that I thought I would purchase in a year, when this is over. Delusional? Sure, but it made me feel better at the time. Like, the hope was out there. I started to take the front pages off of the catalogs and I recently went to the various websites and catalogchoice.org to get rid of most of them. Not only am I cutting down on the wasted paper going into my recycling bin, but the temptation isn’t there for me to consider cheating on the program.
3. Online shopping is one of my favorite things to do. To cut down on the temptation I unsubscribed from most of my favorite clothing stores and their promotional emails. I still go and look occasionally. I even fill a basket with beautiful things or deals I just can’t pass up. (The thrill for me is in the hunt, not necessarily in the purchase.) I then do one of two things. I leave the window open on the back of the computer until I get the guts to remove everything from my basket or I leave the site and forfeit my basket. I have done this a handful of times since this began and after it is all over, I usually cannot remember what I coveted. I don’t spend hours researching the best price and shopping on different sites, again saving time and money.
4. I declared gift cards as my safety net. I don’t count these in the realm of money, at least not my own. If I spend them, I spend them on what I want. I did get some for Christmas, but even the ones that I have used have been spent on items for the family instead of clothes. (I will admit to one exception, well two, a pair of clearance shoes.) I needed something to keep me sane in this process and that is my one caveat, although for the most part I haven’t needed it.

These simple acts have afforded me enough free time to be present. I am in the here and now when I am with my kids. I am not focused on what I look like when I show up for pick up in the school parking lot. I am focused on what kind of day my daughter had. I am not worried if my cardigan is from last year when I run the Girl Scout meeting. I have 15 wonderful girls sitting in front of me that could care less. I am not flipping through catalogs and websites to find something great on sale for a price I can afford. I am teaching my daughter to read and my son to play catch. It surprises me that these simple things mean the world to me right now. I am not sure if it is making a difference in my hopes and dreams, but I know it is making a difference in theirs. My time will come and hopefully my big questions will be answered, but in the mean time I am going to enjoy the openness, the free time and my willingness to breathe.

Posted in Magpie Girl
Tags: A Year Without Clothes |