distracted by sparkly things since 1969

Surviving Hormone Stew

You know what would be really helpful? If every woman had a “cycle buddy” who would email them at certain points in their hormonal madness. For instance, if you were ovulating, your cycle buddy would email you and say:

Morning love! You are ovulating right now and all the evolutionary nerves in your body are on high alert. If you are feeling at all inclined to call up that man you know is positively toxic, but is sounding like such a good idea right now, for heaven’s sake DO NOT SLEEP WITH HIM. Also, if at this moment, you are suddenly aching for baby number three, you should BY NO MEANS forego your birth control tonight or anytime in the next week. Have a nice day!

-Your Cycle Buddy

Conversely, you would get something like this just before your period…

Hello dear. I promise you everything is going to feel much better in just a few days. You probably aren’t doing a terrible job at work. I’m sure your friends all love you. And no, I don’t think you look fat in those jeans. Repeat after me: “This too shall pass.“Now kindly get under the covers with a hot water bottle and eat some chocolate. There, there now, isn’t that much better?

-Your Cycle Buddy

What do you think? Could we write a little macro and start our own webpage to send out automated wisdom at just the right time?

15 comments

1 amy { 7 Mar 2008 at 7:54 am }

this is wonderful—thanks for making me laugh…and wish that this did indeed exist. sounds like a plan to me. when you get that thing workin’ you let me know :)

xo

2 carrie { 7 Mar 2008 at 8:27 am }

That is so sweet & necessary.

3 tanaya { 7 Mar 2008 at 9:03 am }

oh goodness, that IS why i was sitting at my desk crying real tears for no real apparent reason…. :)

4 Flower { 7 Mar 2008 at 9:34 am }

OMG, that is genius!!

Thanks so much for making me laugh out loud!

5 Karla MG { 7 Mar 2008 at 10:13 am }

LOVE IT (spoken just like a true Dragon Tale mama!) Of course, mine are PG hormones at the moment because I didn’t get that warning from my cycle buddy last Novemeber!!! Hehehe! Let me know when you get this wonderful idea up and running, cuz after baby number 4, I’d love to share in a wonderful, womanly community of cycle support! (((HUGS))) as you journey through your cycle this month! –Karla

6 Heidi Renee { 7 Mar 2008 at 12:46 pm }

blogger friend has this – i’ll ask her and send you the link

7 Elaine { 7 Mar 2008 at 12:57 pm }

I’d pay good money for such a thing. Especially since I woke up this morning thinking the most indecent thoughts and then realized my husband is far away and I am ovulating.

Excellent.

8 Shalet { 7 Mar 2008 at 1:41 pm }

Oh please do write that macro! I’d subscribe in a heart beat!!!!

9 jen lemen { 7 Mar 2008 at 11:00 pm }

oh my lord, SO necessary this wisdome!!! this week especially. are you SURE i’m not driving everyone crazy and that my friends do love me? (going to eat chocolate now)

10 Susan Young { 7 Mar 2008 at 11:00 pm }

Truly one of those ideas that will change the universe!

11 Denise { 8 Mar 2008 at 4:28 am }

Those all sound like really good ideas!

12 Denise { 8 Mar 2008 at 4:28 am }

Those all sound like really good ideas!

13 Roberta J. { 8 Mar 2008 at 6:45 am }

That is a great idea!!! I wonder how hard it would be to make it available for people with hormone disorders, like myself! My estrogen likes to play tricks on me from time to time!

14 Rachelle { 10 Mar 2008 at 12:44 am }

Oo! Oo! Mabye it could be a patch that assesed when you were going to feel tipsy from a hormone shift and could give you the right message from a little microchip. I think there should be different voices — like the sweet nanny voice, or the no-nonsense mama voice. You could program it to rotate through the voices so the message stayed “fresh.” :-)

I know when I was nursing my hormone stew used to tip when the babies started nursing more (during a growth spurt) or less, especially when they started self-weaning. It helped me feel less afraid of the waves of depression or anxiety when I knew they were chemical and that “this too shall pass.”

Susan — this idea came to me because of the conversations we had in the car about how helpful it would have been if someone had explained hormone flux to us better when we were younger! :-)

May you all have a stable day!

15 Jennifer { 10 Mar 2008 at 6:39 pm }

Oh what a grand idea. I think everyone women needs one of these!!

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