I swear to God, if this headache doesn’t go away soon I’m going to conduct a turn of the century lobotomy and put a hole in my head with the battery operated power drill Paul got at Costco last weekend. Either that, or do an end-run around the addiction thing and join some 12 step group just before imbibing truck loads of controlled substances.

Gin and tonics also work, as long as you never EVER stop drinking them.

Do you have any idea how much is SUCKS to write the really boring “marketing analysis” part of a book proposal when you are on day 13 of a migraine that is rapidly escalating to dark-room-and-ice-pack-stage?

Okay, enough bitching, time for an inspiring quote:

“To view your life as blessed does not require you to deny your pain. It simply demands a more complicated vision…”
Isn’t that great? It goes on…

“…one in which a condition or event is not either good or bad but is, rather, both good and bad, not sequentially but simultaneously. In my experience, the more such ambivalences you can hold in your head, the better off you are, intellectually and emotionally. Categorical statements become meaningless. The saddest stories are shot through with humor. You come to tolerate people, ideas, and circumstances wholly at odds with your dreams and desires.”
- Nancy Mairs, Carnal Acts: Essays

One problem, I don’t think I can hold many more ambivalences in my head. At least, not without the help of that controlled substance….

there are three posts today, so scroll dooooowwwwwnnnn…

Aqualung: Strange and Beautiful
Dreamy, melodic…makes you want to be melancholically in love with someone so intense you forget to eat anything other than artisan bread and strawberries.

The Dante Club: A Novel
Okay, so I had to to take notes on the back page of my paperback in order to keep track of the broad cast of characters , but now I’m so into it I can hardly put down this sophisticated literary mystery.

The Piggle I’ve started this and torn in out so many times I’ve probably knit three of these puppies. A knitting pal just told me how to string a “lifeline” thread through each set of lace repeats so that if I make a mistake I only have to unravel a few lines. Phew! Catie better wear this hat every day for a year!

Once upon a time there was a girl named Zoë.
Zoë looked like an ordinary girl.
Zoë did ordinary girl things.
But Zoë was not an ordinary girl.

Zoë had a secret superpower. Read the rest of this entry »

It’s nearly the end of March….how’s the body love month going?

For myself, I’ve had a hard time remembering to use my mantra, “I love my body as I love my child.” I usually only remember when I’m doing something heinous, like eating a hostess cupcake (100% artificial ingredients!) It doesn’t stop me from eating the rest of the creamy filling, but it is making me pause and think about how I treat my very self. I don’t expect to keep up all the habitude practices I try on this year, but I will keep working on my mantra.

I can’t let a month of body love go by with out kibitzing about my very favorite girlie products. So here’s a list of things I love, just for the record.

MISO PRETTY CASSIS BUBBLE BATH. Oh so luxerious! Mounds of fluffy bubbles with a distinct but not overpowering scent. I love gazing at the bottle which has some of the best art graphics around these days. (The artist has a big new gig–the spring displays hanging all around target.) This is just one great product from the kitschy and empowering Blue Q.

BURTS BEES Grapefruit & Sugarbeet Conditioner. Keeps this natural redhead (wink wink) moisturized and shiny, with natural ingredients to boot.

ZIA MOISTURIZER with Sunscreen. Just a tiny bit spendy, and available at most whole foods type grocery stores. The non-sunscreen one is too heavy — don’t buy the wrong one. Feels so good on my no-longer-twenty-something skin.

ALBA LIP TINT in Sienna. The Magpie Girl doesn’t go anywhere without it. I’ve got one in my the pocket of my vintage car coat, one in my Queen Bee satchel, and one in the pocket of my favorite jeans. A glorified lip balm with just the right amount of color.

AVALON ORGANICS BODY LOTION. Such great scents and really creamy with a quick absorbtion. My favorite? Lavendar or peppermint. I’ve got a bottle on my desk right now!

Much love to all you in body recovery! Stay tuned for next months habitude…I’ll give you a hint, it will save you gas money

to do when you’ve been sick a long time and are getting depressed.

1) Take a shower and wash your hair. If it’s long, put it in a ponytail, if it’s short slick it back under a bandana. Put on a clean sweatshirt (not the one you’ve been sleeping in for six days) and call the look “sporty.”

2) While you’re at it brush, floss, moisturize. You’ll feel better.

3) Change your sheets, crack the window, and take all the glasses you’ve accumulated on the beside table to the kitchen. (You don’t have to wash them, just get ‘em to the kitchen.)

4) Consume at least one thing that is not chemical and in the shape of the pill — a tall glass of water, a piece of fruit, a green salad. (It’s okay to have the salad delivered from the pizza guy.)

5) Repeat: “This too shall pass.” (Even if it is a migraine that hasn’t gone away since last Saturday.)

6) Get back in the bed with the very clean sheets. Be kind to yourself if you can.

Read how this Irish lass celebrated here.

May the road rise up to meet you, and may the wind be always at your back!

My migraine is back (hello darkness my old friend) and it’s hard to wax poetic about the miraculous wonder of being an embodied soul. But I did want to check in about our habitude for March.

I’ve taken Jen B.’s advice and adopted a mantra for the month. Every time I eat or drink I say to myself “I love my body as I love a child.” It came to me after I realized I would never treat my children’s bodies the way I treat my own. I don’t always remember to say it, but I often do, and I’ve been pleasantly surprised at how often I am making good choices without even thinking about it. Sometimes at the end of the day I go over my food and movement for the day and recite my mantra over each memory. I’m learning a lot…I have a lot to learn.

Inspired by the book Intuitive Eating, I’ve also thrown away all my dieting stuff and given up dieting for good. My Weight Watcher’s point counters are tossed and my scale is deprived of batteries and lying in the back of my closet. I’m eating what I want when I want it, as along as I’m hungry. The first two weeks I worried about gaining more, but so far all my clothes fit the same and my favorite pair of jeans fear maybe feels a little looser.The hardest part is determining whether I’m hungry physically, or just emotionally, but I don’t think I’m falling off the wagon too often.

I’m still writing my morning letters to my body about three days a week. It’s been surprising to me how sympathetic I feel towards my body when I treat her (me) as a person and not as a mysterious, manipulative entity to be battled.

Mostly pleasingly, I’ve noticed a distinct decrease in the amount of negative self talk I do about my body. I have this huge mirror in our bathroom which makes seeing my body (me) as a whole every morning unavoidable. Sometimes, I even smile.

What’s your mantra this month?

Oh to live like this and this!

Brought to me (and thereby to you) by the amazing folks at the Simple Way.

Here we are again talking about how to break the stereotypical rotten-body-image thing that most American females are restricted by, and find a more shalom-like way to acknowledge, relate to, and treat our bodies.

None of us seem sure of how to get there, but that’s okay, I’m pretty good at stumbling around in the dark until we can light one candle.

Here’s my question for today, what are the absolute basic necessities for you as your body. I’m not talking about what you should be doing according to the latest Hollywood trainer or even according to your wholesome good-spirited naturopath. I’m talking about what you intuitively know to be bedrock-necessary for your body given who you are and how you are at this stage in your life.

Don’t know the answer? Do what Jen always tells me to do: get very quiet and be very brave and spend some time with your journal. Or if you are a kinetic learner, try taking a walk without your headphones. It will come to you. Your body – you – knows what you need.

I find I need to do this a couple of times a year, usually when I’ve let one of my bedrock needs fall out of my daily rhythm. Some of the things on my list remain the same, while others change with health, season, and age. I find that there are usually more than three and less than ten. If I get more than ten, I’ve drifted out of “bedrock” and into “preference” or “shoulds.” Here are mine for the present:

What I (as my Body) Need Right Now

Silence while working and driving.

Sleep from 10pm-7am.

Gentle exercise everyday.

To drink water after 3pm.

To honor my fullness and my hunger.

To knit and write every day – and consequently to ice my wrist every night.

What are yours?